Helpful Hint

When missing your child it is a good idea to write him/her a letter. You can keep this letter in a diary/journal or seal it up in an envelope. Keep these letters in a safe place for when he/she is older and ready to have a healthy relationship with you.

Practical Tip

Whenever you interact with your child or any adult that is opposed to you having a relationship with your child find a way to have a witness present. Use friends, family, tape recorders, or video. More than one is helpful. Check your local laws before using recording devices and the rules of evidence then DOCUMENT EVERYTHING and maintain the chain of custody with your evidence so that it is less likely to be thrown out of court.

Parents

Parents are an important part of a child's life. When a child is kept from one or both parents without a good reason (abuse or neglect that has been proven in a criminal court) a child's world falls apart. When a child is taught to hate or distrust one or both parents a child is taught to hate him/herself. As a parent watches his or her child slowly sink into this hatred it causes a wide range of emotions that can be draining and bewildering. Often times a parent will ask where is the loving relationship we had. It is not unusual to hear a parent in this situation say "I love you" to a child only to hear the child respond with "I hate you".

False accussations of abuse are often used to keep a child away from his or her parent. Sometimes illness is used as an excuse. Children will remember things that they have never witnessed and use phrases that are not age appropriate. While the parent struggles to figure out what has happened to his/her precious little one he/she spends a lot of time in court fighting false allegations,demands for outrageous amounts of child support, trying to see his/her child, or sometimes he/she has to fight to stop the termination of his/her parental rights.

This same parent is treated scornfully by most of society and spends just about every holiday and birthday alone. If he/she decides to move on with his/her life and start a new family there is criticism when he/she cannot support 2 families on 1 paycheck. A parent's reward for all of this is to be labeled a "deadbeat" and have everything that can possibly be take away from him/her. Wages are attached, licenses are revoked, and even his/her freedom can and often is taken.

Does any of this sound familiar? Is this your story? Then you like so many others are a target parent. There is no easy answer or quick cure to this problem. By putting a name to your problem you've taken the first step. You are not alone and you can deal with this. You are stronger than you think and it is that strength that will help you survive this and help you help your child heal.